It’s curious how time goes by, it seems like yesterday when I had to prepare his layette, by his first clothes… and all of a sudden, tomorrow is the day I’m going with him to buy his wedding suit. When you have a kid you don’t think time is going to fly by, well it does, and here I am flying with him, and preparing his wedding already!
As the groom’s mother, things for me are more relaxed, since all the ‘weight’ of the important decision of the celebration, are on the bride and her family. But that doesn’t mean my excitement and interest in the success of the wedding is minor.
Tomorrow I will share with him a shopping day, like when he was little…but this time to try on his wedding suit.
It’s very important to know your children’s’ personality to help them look amazing that day, but letting them be the ones who decide.
You know how mothers can be, sometimes so caring, that can end up overwhelming the toughest. That day, besides looking handsome, they have to feel comfortable and happy, they should express with their attire who they are and what they like.
White shirt?
Suit? Tux?
Waistcoat?
And the tie? What colour?
And the cufflinks?
I keep asking myself, why are there thousands of blogs that talk about useful advices to inexperienced first-time mothers having babies, but rarely see blogs giving advice to grooms’ inexperienced mums… and to be honest, we are equally inexpert now as we were before, when we used to change his nappies…
My advice is, to let them celebrate and enjoy their day with complete and absolute freedom of criteria, let them decide, give their opinion, and us, we give advice only if they ask for it.
There is no such thing more frustrating for a bride than a groom’s mother who is annoying and takes over all the preparations and decisions concerning the wedding. We have to be discrete and obliging, with one objective…their happiness.
But let’s talk about what concerns us, their attire for the special day!
If it’s possible to get a tailored suit, it will always suit them better, now a days there are a vast range of prices for tailored suits offered by different tailoring lines.
In this places you have different marvellous designs and fabrics to choose from for the suit to look perfect! Ask him if the jacket is too tight, or the sleeves too short, or the trouser should fit like a glove…he should look elegant but feel comfortable.
Make sure the quality and the production of the clothing is proportional to what you are paying for it. Help him choose the tie, or tell him if he looks better with or without waistcoat… he must choose a suitable shoe, you know that today the masculine complements play a major role! Is not only the garment!
Everyone is going to look at him, and the photographs are for a lifetime, every single detail of their attire has to be perfect, even though the bride is the protagonist, he has to look splendid too!
Make sure all the details the quality of the fabric, the needlework is well done, that all of it looks amazing, but let him be the one that chooses, and don’t put pressure on him at any moment.
Keep telling him he looks great! You are his mother for a reason! Enjoy shopping with him for such an important occasion, make the most of his confidence in you and his company.
No one is prepared to be a parent. There are no courses, or books, or advices, or warnings that can reflect the way in which it will change your life, of how there is a huge revolution when a child arrives to your life. This revolution is multiplied, when that baby grows up and eventually, he gets married!
Luckily, time has prepared you to know that this experience, if possible, is even better than raising them. Since it means the closure of a circle, where they start to create their own family… for a mother that is: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
The best love, is the one that makes you be better, never the one that tries to change you!
Isabel Planelles
Groom’s mother diary